


Cas' first Christmas or how Dean ended up with angel feather in the trunk of Impala

by EstelUndomiel (capn_cecil_ang)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Christmas Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-15
Updated: 2014-07-15
Packaged: 2018-02-09 00:57:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1962894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/capn_cecil_ang/pseuds/EstelUndomiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Basically what it says - Cas' first Christmas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cas' first Christmas or how Dean ended up with angel feather in the trunk of Impala

**Author's Note:**

> Written on Christmas 2013.  
> All rights reserved to the SPN writers!

Dean steps aside his creation and sighs in contentment.

“Awesome,” he sighs out as he is still admiring his perfectly decorated Christmas tree. Well, almost perfectly decorated. He tried, oh hell he tried, but he couldn’t possible find anything for the top of the tree – no stars, no angels, nothing. He briefly played with the thought of hanging Castiel up there, but he decided right after it wouldn’t be very appropriate. Especially when he wanted this Christmas to be perfect; for everybody, but mostly for Cas. Because it was Castiel’s first Christmas ever celebrated. Sure they had their heads full of Crowley and demon tablets and other things but why the hell not give a break for a one freaking night in the year? Did they want so much? Just a piece of quiet and peace to celebrate with one’s whose dearest to Dean’s heart. Just one freaking peaceful night.

“It’s beautiful, Dean,” Dean is suddenly torn away from his thoughts by familiar husky voice sounding from behind him. He quickly turns around and sees ever so slightly scruffy looking angel standing in the door frame. Dean can’t suppress a smile which creeps to his face at the sight of his best friend.

“Cas,” he breaths out, still half in his thoughts, half in the room with Castiel. Castiel seems to be astonished by the decoration in the room, his eyes fixed on the tree, sparkling like two candles in the dusk of the room.

“This,” Castiel says slowly, his eyes never leaving the Christmas tree. “This is all your job, Dean?”

“Well, yes,” Dean’s smile widens as he lifts one hand to run it through the back of his neck.

“It’s breathtaking,” Castiel says, his voice clearly thrilled as his eyes flicks to Dean’s for a moment. And in this moment Dean feels the redness filling his cheeks and he is thankful the room is lighten only by the bulbs of the three.

“Well, it’s not ready. You’re not supposed to see it until the evening, so, get out,” Dean says teasingly as he throws his hands in general direction indicating Castiel to leave the room. As he is following the angel he however can’t let go of the warm feeling in his heart from the thought Castiel liked what he has done for him.

TTTTTT

            Dean and Castiel are preparing the dishes in the main room of the bunker, when they hear the sound of the door opening.

“Hey guys,” they hear Sam’s cheerful voice from above the stairs. “Look who I brought with me.” As he descends the stairs there appear two smaller figures behind him in the door, both dark haired and delicate looking.

“Kevin, Mrs. Tran,” Dean exclaims, his smile returning to his face. “It’s so good to see you,” he says as he motions himself to the stairs waiting for them to descend. They exchange few hugs in greeting, a habit they’ve picked up from Garth somehow.

And speaking about him :-)...

“What about Garth?” Dean turns to ask his brother. “He said he will come, didn’t he?”

“He will,” Sam sighs out a bit warily. “He said he has a job yet and that he will come later.”

“Oh, ok then.” Dean shrugs.

“And... he says we don’t need to wait with dinner for him. Just to leave him at least some pie.”

Dean laughs a bit and nods. “Very well, then. Everyone, this way,” he points to the table where five plates are prepared and a pile of various foods.

“I believe we will not need the fifth plate then,” Castiel says as he wants to take the remaining plate and carry it to the kitchen. As he extends his hand to reach for the plate he is however stopped by Dean’s hand reaching for his wrist.

“Come on, Cas,” Dean smirks. “It doesn’t mean that when you don’t need to eat you can’t eat.”

“But, Dean.” Castiel tries to protest. “It would be the waste of the good food...”

“I don’t take no as an answer,” Dean insists giving him his hardest look. Castiel however sees the twinkling sparks of joy in Dean’s eyes and the twitching of the corners of his mouth and he knows Dean isn’t really mad. In fact, he seems to be the happiest Castiel ever saw him during those past five years they know each other. And so Castiel only nods and smiles a little. Because he doesn’t want to spoil the atmosphere, or Dean’s effort.

            So they all sit behind the table, enjoying the food and cheerfully talking about happier events in their lives which doesn’t involve monsters, demons, dick angels and other for them usual stuff. And one could have wonder, that they have plenty of such happier topics to talk about. Even Castiel seems to be happy to submit to Dean and take part in the Christmas dinner. The food is delicious and he can’t stop extols Dean’s culinary skills.

TTTTTT

            After dinner they do quick work on the dishes and moves to the small room with the Christmas decoration and the splendidly decorated Christmas tree.

“Wow, you’ve done a great job, Dean,” Sam praises him, as he walks into the room, admiring the decoration.

“Well, thank you,” Dean says from behind the table where he is pouring everyone a glass of eggnog.

“Oh man, look what I have found,” he holds out the glass in shape of the moose in front of Sam, laughing like a little child.

Sam makes his trademark bitch face, but it doesn’t last long as he bursts into the fit of laughter too. They all drink and laugh and just have a really good time for about few hours, simply enjoying each others’ company.

            Dean slowly switches from eggnog to his more preferable beer and soon he finds himself sitting on the couch next to Castiel, laughing at something the angel just said. Castiel seems to enjoy the eggnog quite much, maybe a bit too much. It seems to affect him a bit as he seems to loosen up a bit and just relaxing finally. And maybe it is not because of the eggnog, but because of the presence of good friends and just a generally good time.

TTTTTT

            As the time goes by and Garth doesn’t seem to be showing up any time soon, they decide they’ll proceed with presents. Mrs. Tran and Kevin goes first and Dean is more than pleasantly surprised, when he opens their collective present and there is the golden star for the top of the tree.

“We were thinking about what to give you guys for Christmas and we couldn’t figure out anything,” Kevin says and looks at his mother, who continues,

“So we thought, since we don’t have a proper home right now. I mean, Garth’s houseboat is great, but... it is not home,” she falls silent for a while, “we just wanted to give you something from our former home, to make you feel here more welcomed, as we know, you have never had a proper home too.”

Dean and Sam are literally speechless for a long moment of the time. “I... I don’t know what to say,” Sam finally stutters something out.

“What about thank you, guys?” Kevin smirks and Dean laughs again, trying to hide the little drops of tears which started to form in the corner of his eyes. He doesn’t know why the hell he is so emotional today, but he surely wouldn’t like to burst out crying in front of all of them. Truth is they are like family to him, family he didn’t have for a long period of time. But that surely doesn’t mean he will do any chick-flick moments in front of them now.

“Thank you, guys,” he says softly as he hands the star over back to Kevin’s mom.

“What if you went to hang it on the top of the tree?” he smiles softly. “So you know this always will be your home too.”

Mrs. Tran and Kevin smiles simultaneously and stand up to go to put the star up. As they are in front of the three, Mrs. Tran trying to reach out for the top, Castiel seems to feel like having another eggnog and he reaches for the glass in the shape of the moose.

“Look at me,” he says mockingly, imitating Sam’s voice. “I am Sam Winchester and I have a more fabulous hair than you will ever have.”

Dean doesn’t even realise how but he notices he has his arm wrapped around Castiel’s shoulder, in the other hand he hold his beer. But he doesn’t mind, because he feels comfortable as hell like this and he lets his laughter rings through the every corner of the bunker. Kevin and Sam seem to be amused by Castiel’s joke too, however the latter one seems to also already become with an idea to strike back. He imperceptibly opens his laptop, seeing Dean doesn’t paying him attention at all as he is still laughing hard at Castiel, and he searches out the glasses in the shape of the squirrel. Oh yeah, Dean definitely getting one on his birthday.

            As they are all having fun they don’t even realise Garth has just come with the armful of various Christmas stuff, like moose antlers, Santa’s hats and many other completely useless stuff which however for now seems to be the most important things in the world.

            When everyone greets with Garth, hugs can’t be missing of course, and they all are given one of the decorations to put on their heads, they come back to giving each others’ the presents. It all seems cheery and easy going, until it is the turn for Castiel to give Dean his present.

Castiel suddenly seems to stiffen again, as if the eggnog or whatever Christmas miracle seemed to make him relax faded away. He flickers his gaze between Dean’s eyes and the salad looking decoration above the table with eggnog and a mini fridge with beers, as he is fidgeting on the red couch, next to Dean. He finally sighs out a long heavy sigh and decides to fix his gaze with Dean’s. Everyone is completely silence and the tension in the room could be cut. Everyone seems to sense Castiel’s gift for Dean won’t be anything so casual.

“Dean,” Castiel starts and Dean jumps a bit at the seriousness of Castiel voice. He thinks maybe it is the beer and maybe it is the urgency in Castiel voice and his eyes, but Dean feels like his heart is clenching more and more with every next words Castiel is saying. “I... I wasn’t quite sure, what to give you on this holiday, since I have never experienced the joy of celebrating one of these and I... and I wasn’t quite sure what people usually give to each other. I mean, I am here for about five years and I am still just grasping the basics about humans and their habits and behaviour.”

Dean finds himself only bluntly staring at Castiel, unable to say a word or even move, his thigh still firmly plastered to Castiel’s, his body warm overwhelming Dean’s body too.

“So I thought about the day we met and why I was sent to you at the first place,” Castiel continues. Dean nods slightly, trying to find any hint of what Castiel means in his eyes, but failing miserably.

“I was sent to protect you, Dean Winchester,” Castiel says slowly and significantly, “and yet I wasn’t able to protect you always since I wasn’t able to be with you all the time.” he goes silent for a while as his eyes drops to him palms, carefully folded in his lap. “I know this have no power in protecting you from the evil, but at least I can be comforted by the thought the part of me will always be with you, no matter what.”

Dean is only blankly looking into Castiel’s eyes for a while, when his gaze finally drops to Castiel’s hands and he sees they are not empty anymore. Castiel is holding one perfectly neat, long and thick, ebony black feather. Dean feels like his hand is doing whatever it wants when it reaches out to grab the feather gently and he feels the softness of it on his skin, like a comforting touch of beloved person.

“Cas,” Dean only manages to say as he looks up to meet Castiel’s eyes again, seeing the significance of unspoken words in them. Castiel just gave the piece of himself to him. And what does Dean have prepared for him? The worst gift ever.

Dean clears his throat as he says a silent “Thank you.” to Castiel and reaches for his present for him. He would like to stop the time right now and try to figure out what to do, but he knows there is no power in this world to do this. Not even in their world full of supernatural crap. So he only sighs heavily and clears his throat again, handing the bottle of quite expensive Jack Daniels to Castiel.

“Ehm, so I thought.” he starts, trying to avoid Castiel’s eyes, “you’ve been on Earth for about five years now, man, and you have never tasted one of the best alcohol ever made... so, here you are, enjoy this.” Dean is fixing his gaze on his shoes as he is handing the bottle to Castiel, seeing by the corner of his eyes how his brother is trying from very strength of his not to do a face palm, but failing miserably.

“Thank you, Dean,” Dean can hear Castiel soft voice and he forces a smile on his face.

“Well,” he says, trying to lighten up the awkward situation, “we should try it, don’t we?”

“Yes, sure,” Castiel says, handing the bottle to Dean to open it up and pour the drink into the glasses.

“I will pass, thank you,” Mrs. Tran says, as Dean looks at her, raising his brow in question, and when he looks over Kevin, she only adds: “Kevin is good with eggnog too, right, honey?”

“Sure,” Kevin surrenders and in the end it is only Dean, Sam and Castiel sharing the whiskey. For Dean’s double disappointment however, Castiel doesn’t like the taste of it very much, though he tries to hide his almost-coughing-up-his-lungs reaction.

“Well then, I guess it’s only you and me then,” Dean says as he nurses the glass with whisky closer to his heart, sinking into the couch trying to find some inner hidden ability of his to disappear completely.

TTTTTT

             After some time of unsuccessful effort from Dean’s side to drink himself into unconsciousness he decides to go grab another beer. As he stands to walk towards the mini fridge he realises he feels pretty sober despite the fact he was drinking for the past two hours constantly. He just shrugs and shakes his head, blaming his alcohol resistance which he probably built over the years. It wasn’t the first time he thought about his ability to get drunk anymore crossed his mind and the truth was in the past few months he founded it harder and harder to get wasted. Apparently there will be something about this alcohol immunity of his. But that doesn’t mean he will stop trying. At least when he will be successful, he will remember only the first part of the evening, hopefully.

So he walks towards the mini fridge grabbing one of the last beers from it and turns around, when he almost bumps into trench coated angel.

“Cas?” he exclaims. “What the hell?”

“I have decided to try one this brews of yours,” Castiel says, eyeing the beer in Dean’s hands suspiciously.

“Oh, ok,” Dean makes a grimace and turns to pull another beer from the fridge, handing it to Castiel.

As they are standing there, sipping from their beers, Dean suddenly asks, his mouth apparently outrunning his brain before he could stop it. “Did it hurt?”

Castiel frowns a bit and tilts his head into that particular angle he seems to do every time he isn’t quite comprehending something, and which Dean secretly loves.

“Did what hurt?” he asks, still frowning.

“Pulling that feather out of your wing.” Dean elaborates quietly.

“A bit, yes...” Castiel goes silent for a while then decides to add: “You could compare it to breaking one of your bones.”

“Dammit, Cas,” Dean exclaims, horrified not so much by the what Castiel just said but by the calmness in his voice when he said it. There are these times, it’s not often, but it happens, when Dean forgets Castiel is an actual angel and the warrior of God. “You didn’t need to,” Dean says quietly.

“I wanted to,” Castiel only replies.

Dean searches for his eyes and just stares at him for a while. “I’m sorry,” he says finally.

“I don’t understand,” Castiel frowns again. “For what?”

“For my lame gift,” Dean lowers his eyes for a while, but lifts them up again as soon as he feels the comforting warmth of Castiel’s hand on his shoulder.

“Your gift wasn’t... lame, Dean,” Castiel says softly. “You have given me all of this,” he shows around himself. “You have given me... Christmas. And it is more than everyone has ever given to me.”

Dean stares into Castiel eyes again, thinking, deciding, overthinking again. When suddenly they are interrupted by someone next to them clearing his throat. They both look to the direction of the sound and they see Sam standing there with wide smug smile, like was up to something.

“What?” Dean frowns at him and Sam says nothing, only looks above Dean’s and Castiel’s heads, his smile even wider. Dean looks up at stiffens immediately.

“Dean, what’s that salad looking like decoration above us mean?” Castiel asks confused, but Dean isn’t able to reply. He is too busy overthinking his next move.

“It’s mistletoe, Cas,” Sam says softly.

Dean wants to do it, but he isn’t sure he should. But what Castiel did and said today, he couldn’t give Dean any clearer signs. He must have... he must have been feeling the same about him...

“It’s a Christmas tradition, Cas,” Dean can hear Sam’s voice but doesn’t pay much attention to it as his eyes are fixed to Castiel whose look is flickering from mistletoe to Sam to Dean and back to mistletoe. “Two people who are standing underneath it, should,” Sam doesn’t finish his sentence as he is quite taken aback by the sudden action from Dean. However there is someone who is even more taken aback. It is Castiel, who only stays still, whole paralysed, eyes openly wide, as Dean’s lips crashes onto his. The kiss it short and still, but Castiel is too much stunned to act on it, or even relax to it. He only stands there, totally shocked, unable to do anything but looking at Dean’s freckled nose and closed eyes, so close to his face. He was always bad in social things, but this, this he can write to the top of his most awkward social situations of all few thousand years he exists.

Dean suddenly leans back like he was just electrocuted, eyes similarly wide as Castiel’s, mouth slightly open, as he tries to come up with some words but it seems like his vocal cords doesn’t cooperate. As he sees the startled look in Castiel’s eyes, his heart drops into his stomach and he feels like the walls of the room are caving in above him. He doesn’t realise he is moving until he isn’t in front of his room, opening the door, not even shutting it behind him, as he slumps over his bed, his face buried into the mattress. And just when he thinks this evening couldn’t get any worse, he hears a soft knocking on the door.

“What?” Dean gnarls and turns on the back to see who is behind the door.

Door opens slowly and Dean’s heart clenches even more as he sees Castiel standing in there.

“May I come in?” he asks unsurely, his eyes lowered to the ground.

“Why?” Dean snaps, saying it more harshly then he would like to.

“To thank you,” Castiel says slowly and fixes his gaze with Dean’s, “and to apologise.”

Dean only frowns, not saying anything and Castiel takes it as a hint and carefully shuts the door behind him as he moves to the bed, sitting next to Dean. Dean raises himself into sitting position, sitting next to Castiel now waiting for him to start.

“I’d like to thank you, Dean,” Castiel starts.

“For what?” Dean interrupts him sternly, cutting him in the middle of sentence. “For a lame gift and making you feel like crap?”

“No,” Castiel frowns. “You’re gift,” he sighs, “you’re gift was one of the best Dean. You don’t realise it, but what you gave to me was more than you think. You gave me all this. You made this evening because of me, because you wanted me to share your habits with me and to make me feel like one of you. And you did. You made me feel like, like one of you again, like... like the part of the family.” he falls silent, looking down at their hands, laid one next to another.

“And I want to apologise.” he continues, “for my reaction to that...”

“No. No, Cas.” Dean shakes his head. “It’s me who should be apologising. I shouldn’t have to. I... I’m sorry. It was inappropriate and I... I thought you... I’m sorry. I have misread some signals apparently.”

“You have not,” Castiel says softly, taking Dean’s hand in his gently.

“You?” Dean asks, unable to finish the sentence.

Castiel only nods. “I’m sorry. I... I didn’t think my feelings were reciprocated. I... I wasn’t expecting something like that to happen... ever... not yet today. I... I shouldn’t have acted like I did. I’m sorry.”

“Cas,” Dean’s voice breaks, “do you...?”

“Yes, Dean.” Castiel’s mouth quirks a bit. “I do.”

“For how long?”

“I’m... not sure. I... didn’t realise it at first. I... didn’t know what it was what I was feeling towards you. It started as a friendship, but... I believe after everything we have done for each other, after everything what we’ve been through, what else should it be, if not love?”

“Cas?” Dean asks almost inaudibly, his eyes closed, trying to suppress the tears in them.

“Yes?” Castiel asks, his voice anticipating.

“I know I have already given you a gift, but... I’d like to give you yet one more. I’d like to give you something I have been throwing away quite recklessly almost all my life. Something I... I don’t want to give to anyone, but you anymore.”

Dean shifts closer to Castiel and joins their lips experimentally. He can feel Castiel closes his eyes simultaneously with his and he feels he relaxes and wholly loosens again as Dean puts one hand around his waist, the other one goes to his slightly loosened tie. The kiss is short and innocent, but it feels so right to both of them, they could imagine stay like this forever.

Dean leans back and rests his forehead against Castiel’s, looking into his ocean blue eyes. They both already know what Dean means under this gift, but Dean still feels the need to say it out loud, or he would think it is all just a dream.

“I want to give you... me,” he breaths out, leaning into Castiel’s touch as he moves one of his hands to Dean’s cheek, soothing small circles with his thumb. He smiles and nods, leaning forward and placing another kiss on Dean’s lips. Dean slowly loosens Castiel’s tie and throws it somewhere next to the bed as he starts working on his buttons slowly, never leaving his lips.

TTTTTT

            Dean nuzzles into the warm body next to him, clinging closer the naked chest of other man. Castiel tightens his grip around Dean’s shoulder and presses him closer to him, breathing in the scent of his hair.

“You know,” Dean says, as his head is still on Castiel’s chest, “for a virgin you’ve been awfully skilful.”

“I have told you we’ve been watching the Earth for a long period of time, Dean,” Castiel says, smirking slightly.

“You sneaky bastard,” Dean laughs heartily. As he raises his head, turning it to look at Castiel, his features are suddenly very much serious. “Have you ever, you know, watched me during sex?” he asks.

“No,” Castiel says without hesitation. “I have... I didn’t want to intrude you’re privacy. Because I thought you didn’t want me to...”

“All this time I’ve been trying to bury myself in meaningless sex only to try not thinking about you. If I have just known sooner.”

“You can’t change the past, Dean.” Castiel interrupts him gently, letting one hand to go through Dean’s hand, the other one soothing comforting circles in his back. “No one can. You already know this. All you can change is your future. You can pave it just like you want, _that_ is up to you.”

“I want to pave it with you, Cas.” Dean says immediately. “And Sammy, and Kevin, Mrs. Tran and Garth... With family.”

“It’s only up to you, Dean.” Castiel smiles gently at him.

Dean returns to his position on Castiel’s chest, laying like this, without telling a words, just savouring the moment. It is not until Castiel’s question he realises he is sobbing slightly.

“Dean. Are you crying?” Castiel asks quietly, his voice a bit concerned.

“I’m,” Dean turns to look at Castiel again, unable to stop the tears anymore.

“I’m just so happy like, like I have never been yet.” he smiles through the tears. “And I just don’t want this to ever end.”

Castiel wipes his tears with his thumbs and holds his head in his hands as he looks into his eyes meaningfully and says: “And it won’t. I promise.”

“I love you, Cas.” Dean finally finds the courage to say it and is overwhelmed by the emotion of safeness and comfort he feels only by saying those three words, because he knows Castiel loves him back. He knows Castiel would do anything for him. And he knows this is something you don’t find any day – a true love, your soul mate, your.... angel.

“I love you too, Dean.” Castiel says as he joins their lips together again, letting them to say all the unspoken feelings of devotion and loyalty and love he cherishes towards his hunter.

And he knows, this is the best Christmas ever. And he also knows it will be hard to outdo this year’s Christmas the next year. And the next one and the next one too. Because he plans to stick with Dean forever. But it doesn’t matter what kind of Christmas they will have. It doesn’t matter if they will have any Christmas at all yet. Even if this one were his first and also the last, he knows the only important thing in this world is Dean and the fact they love each other beyond the grave. Because they are family.


End file.
